Hard to Love

Its funny how certain things in life slap you in the face, give you perspective and force you to grow. Last night I had one of those moments...

Over the past month, or two... or three if we're going to be honest, I have really been struggling with being a good friend to someone who needs a good friend in her life. Its easy to be a good friend to someone who is a good friend to you. Its easy to love someone who loves you back. Its easy to do nice things for people who appreciate you. Its like that in every relationship. On the other hand, it is NOT easy to be a good friend to someone who pushes you away, ignores you, blows you off, and doesn't appreciate your friendship. But I have been really really trying HARD to be a good friend. After all, those that are hard to love, are often the ones that need it the most. I would say that is the case for my friend in need.

There were times over the past several months that I swore to myself that this is the "LAST" time. I've given up, written her off, cussed her, and cried over her, all to come back and realize that I know she needs a friend. & Last night when I was really fed up with the drama, I realized something There have been people in my life that have been a friend to me when I did not deserve to have a friend at all.

It just all of a sudden hit me... At one point in my life, I was that person that needed a friend. I was the person who treated my friends like they didn't matter. I was the one that blew them off and never appreciated the love that they had for me.

So I decided that I would keep trying, at least one.more.time, to be a good friend... to "pay it forward". I just hope one day she looks up and realizes that she has friends standing by her. But I mostly hope that when she does realize it, that she will be able to be a good friend to someone in need too.

& I hope by sharing this I've encouraged someone to try one more time, or be a friend to someone who needs it. Or to just thank the person that stands by you when times are hard...

& for YOU, the one that the blog is about, I hope you dont take this the wrong way. Im just saying that Im here & Im trying & Im doing my best. & I love you & I hope you get better soon. Im looking forward to brighter days & a stronger friendship.